I grew up with the impression that I sucked at sports, couldn’t run, and was slower than a turtle. With my tiny frame, low muscle tone, and non-existent skills, I was typically the last in any school-yard pick. In fact, I’ve always joked with people that when it was time for the 100 metre sprint, it would take me 5 seconds to reach my top speed, and I could stay at my top speed for about 3 seconds before slowing down again.
It took me a long time to lose the baggage, and to finally learn some very important lessons about my assumptions of inadequacy.
- Many kids practice skills in after-school programs – they weren’t born with the ability to kick, throw, catch, and run fast
- Genetics is a factor, however, we’re not talking about Olympic-level athletes
- Support is very important
So there is the truth. I had no idea. The worst thing is, I would have continued to believe that genetics was my downfall well into my 20’s and 30’s if it were not for meeting my husband Rob. He was my great leader who believed in my ability to learn and in fact showed me how to catch and throw. You know the saying “throws like a girl”? People only throw like “girls” when they have not been shown how to properly throw. I throw a football pretty darn well – for a girl. He showed me that hand-eye coordination is something that you learn through practice. With each new skill he taught me, I was able to slowly change my assumptions from “can’t do it”, to “haven’t learned how yet”.
We all need good leaders to believe in us, and show us the way.
Bad assumptions can sound a little silly (Iike mine did) when you tell an objective person. Check your closet for baggage and do a bit of soul-searching.
Look for someone to help you debunk those assumptions. Good leaders can be found in all walks of life. Consider people who seem to be:
1. Positive, can-do attitude about everything
2. Supportive of your decision making
3. Been there, and done that
Have fun debunking your myths, and please share your success stories with me.
- Daisy
Wow … excellent, and heartwarming post. It’s amazing to watch our kids develop those ‘impressions’ of capability early on. My daughter comes home with “I can’t do math”, and then the challenge is to work with them to break free of their self-imposed labels. Love and belief are key!
There was a great post called Education Through Life Experience – You Have So Much To Give, where the basic point was our life legacy is passing on our learning. Wow! That’s so easy, yet so hard!